Ketika ke-bahagia-an dipertanyakan ...

Seorang sahabat bertanya padaku,
"Kamu mau apa setelah ini?"

"Aku mau bahagia. As simple as that!" aku menjawab dengan lantang, tatkala aku sendiri takut menengadah ke arah matanya dan meneriakkan itu dengan lantang.

"Jawabanmu itu abstrak." Dengan lugas ia menjawab sambil meneguk sisa kopi di cangkirnya yang sudah dingin.

Lain hari, seseorang menegurku melalui wajah-wajah tersenyum yang terpampang di halaman tulisannya. Dengan mudah, ia menuliskan, "Bahagia itu sederhana."

Aku memicingkan mata. Mencoba untuk mencerna tiga kata itu dengan sulit. Mencoba menelan mentah-mentah arti dari kata 'sederhana' yang ia paparkan dengan lugas disana.

Bagaimana mungkin kebahagiaan itu sederhana? Bagaimana mungkin seseorang puas hanya dalam hal yang sederhana?

Berjuta-juta pertanyaan melayang-layang dalam pikiranku hingga akhirnya aku sendiri mempertanyakan pertanyaan yang sama kepada diriku berratus-ratus kali,
"Apakah aku bahagia?"

.... lalu, "..dengan apa?"

Comments

a new beginning of friday night

finally . gw memulai resolusi tahun baru gw dengan lebih awal . yeph . gw berencana untuk kembali menulis lagi taun depan. 'moga-moga beneran bisa berjalan lancar' (cross finger!) yah . akhirnya di jumat malem ini, gw tiba-tiba dapet smangat baru . so here i am . at momento cafe with my boy, and other boy friends gw mulai sign up lg buat blog baru dgn harapan gw bisa kembali menjelajahi sisi terdalam gw buat nulis. whatever it sound . hehehe . smangad banget hr ni, padahal sebenernya gw capek bgt . blom da ksempatan bwat plg . blom ada waktu bwat tidur siang . 'haha. realii a keboo!' tapi senenk bgt drtd ngomongin masa-masa depan gw yg bakal gw laluin dengan hectic . weird?! yeph. karena gw lbh suka sibuk dibanding gw harus terpuruk dalam kesendirian dan ke-non-gawean . it drives me nuts ! so . one of the dream for next year . one project . masdha carnival 'bangkit dan bersuara' haha ! smoga sukses kawan-kawan . ayo kita bangkit dan bersuara bersama . it's ...

sebuah cerita dalam keheningan ...

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A new perspective

Someone once told me that there is nothing wrong with changes. He said that it would give me new perspective. He said, with me being away, it would makes me appreciate the thing that I had before. And yes, sure, Lately, I have been feeling it to be true. To be away with the things that I used to hold on - makes me realize that I have been spoiled. And now, I need to learn how to survive. To learn how to be brave again. And, sometimes, inevitably -- learning how to be OK with the sound of nothingness. Of course, once in a while, I envy those people who are still surrounded by luxury things. Obviously, I would constantly complain about the absence of my old routine. And, also sometimes, I would try to run away -- find the best escape route, just to get rid of the pain. How I hate changes. I wish some things were just stay the same -- forever. But then, I won't ever learn how to fly higher. I won't grow. But then, I also kind of asking my self, ... do I real...

Dancing in G Little Utopia

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